


Nobody Clapping

by Ha_neul



Series: Silver Rings [2]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Multi, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-26
Updated: 2016-06-27
Packaged: 2018-07-18 07:33:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,587
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7305451
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ha_neul/pseuds/Ha_neul
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>With Anakin away on a mission, Obi-Wan is left behind at the temple to wait for his return. Obi-Wan finds himself questioning the Code and his feelings when Anakin’s absence affects him more greater than ever before.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Out of Tune

**Author's Note:**

> takes place before Disjointed sometime during the middle of the Clone Wars & post aotc.
> 
> the several other characters that pop up are a combination of side characters that have appeared in things such as the kanan comics, tcw, etc.

The halls of the temple are empty compared to its usual state of bustling activity. Before the war, the grounds of the main hall would be filled with people; Jedi masters and their companions, padawans alongside their fellow students. Not to mention the younglings whose shouts would echo off the huge walls of the temple. 

However, the past few weeks have seen the hall empty, save for the low murmur of the Jedi who choose to stay and guard the temple.

The Clone Wars have taken their toll, and the once-packed halls carry whispers of battles, death, and the names of fallen comrades.

Obi-Wan walks the now-quiet halls, nodding as he passes fellow Jedi. While many chose to stay until further notice, he is one of the few barred from assignments.

An important mission to the Outer Rim left many of the temple’s strongest Jedi absent. The Council, choosing the more cautious approach, deemed it necessary that several Jedi stay behind in case tragedy struck. 

Aayla and Kit are just a few of the remaining Jedi who still roam the halls. Obi-Wan greets them brightly with a smile and a small nod as he continues his journey to his quarters. There is little to be said in these times of waiting, and he appreciates their silence.

He passes a youngling pacing the entryway to Master Billaba’s rooms and pauses; the long lekku trailing after the youngling is unmistakable. Concerned, Obi-Wan makes his way over to the pacing Twi’lek. 

“Sammo Quid? What troubles you?”

Startled, Sammo stands a little straighter. “Master Kenobi!” Fiddling with his robe, Sammo stutters out nervously, “It's, uh, Dume, sir. He's on that Mygeeto mission with Master Billaba and...well…”

Obi-Wan nods in understanding, “Do go on.”

Sammo’s fingers grip the edge of his tunic nervously, and he avoids Obi-Wan’s eyes. “Y’know, Dume’s only a kid...I mean-!” Sammo corrects himself quickly, “he's only just become Master Billaba’s padawan,” Sammo lowers his voice. “I don't think he's ready. This is a big mission and Master Billaba is-,” Eyes briefly darting across the hall, Sammo mumbles, “she’sbadluck.”

Eyes wide, Obi-Wan kneels down so that he is level with Sammo’s height. “I’m sorry, Quid, could you repeat that? I’m afraid I don’t quite understand.”

There’s fear in Sammo’s eyes and his fingers continue to worry at his robe.

Noticing his discomfort, Obi-Wan smiles reassuringly. “It’s okay to tell me, Quid, I won’t judge you. I simply want to help.”

“I heard the rumors from the clones!” Sammo nearly shouts. “They said Master Billaba was a failure. That she’s damaged goods...What if they’re right? Cuz’ Dume’s in danger if they are!” Sammo blurts out, “Dume’s too young to be a padawan! He’s not ready, Uzuma said that herself, and Uzuma’s never wrong!”

Obi-Wan knows of the rumors and of Master Billaba’s situation. He had seen to her re-evaluation after all. The attack by Grievous had left Billaba in a bacta tank for months, and the circumstances behind her actions of command during that time left the Council with a sea of questions regarding if she should stay within the order at all.

But Obi-Wan knows better. Billaba is an excellent Jedi, and an even better teacher.

“Little one, rumors are exactly as you say they are; just rumors. If you wish to know, Billaba is perhaps a far more skilled Jedi than most. Not many survive a meeting with Grievous face-to-face and live to tell the tale.”

Sammo frowns. “I...I guess Master Kenobi, but even so, Tai said-”

“Tai Uzuma is nothing but a youngling like yourself listening to vague rumors, would you think I would lie to you?” Obi-Wan says lightly.

“Well, no sir, but-” 

“Young Uzuma is jealous of the skills Caleb Dume has shown that led to Master Billaba’s choosing him as her padawan. Depa is far more than capable of protecting Caleb. This isn’t his first mission either, you know.”

Sammo nods, still frowning, but his hands relinquish their tight grip on his tunic.

The youngling’s doubt frustrates Obi-Wan. He can’t say for himself that he isn’t worried for the Jedi that have been picked to embark on the Mygeeto mission. It is a dangerous assignment, and its success will be a deciding factor on whether or not the Separatist manage to gain an upper hand in the war. 

Finally, in a last ditch effort to comfort Sammo, Obi-Wan sighs, “You know Sammo, Master Billaba and Caleb aren’t going to be alone. Master Unduli, Koon, and even Windu are all going to be there as well. Master Skywalker too.”

Sammo lets out a surprised gasp at the mention of Anakin’s name, “Really? Master Skywalker is with them?”

Obi-Wan’s heart flutters at the mention of his lover, seemingly having built up quite the reputation for himself among the children at the temple.

“Yes. In fact, he’s leading the entire mission.” 

The grin that Sammo gives Obi-Wan is worth the slight risk of letting Anakin’s ego grow bigger than it already is. The Twi’lek then begins talking about the many exploits of Skywalker's that he's heard of and how ‘amazing’ and ‘totally awesome’ the legendary Jedi is.

“Ugh, I’m a little jealous of Caleb now,” he admits crossing his arms, “Oh! Master Kenobi, you probably have other important things to be doing than talking to me don’t you? I’m sorry if I wasted your time with my...well,” Sammo waves his arms at Billaba’s door, “Y’know.” 

“Think nothing of it,” Obi-Wan says, standing up, “though if you’ll excuse me, I do have some things that need attending to.” As he turns to leave and make his way back to his quarters, Sammo shouts after him.

“Thanks, Master Kenobi!” 

Obi-Wan lets out a chuckle and waves a hand in acknowledgment as he walks down the hall. 

He tries to ignore the lingering thought that Anakin might not be safe out there, that maybe something will go wrong. 

It was inevitable that something like this would come up. He’s gone through countless missions already without Anakin by his side and this is no different, but Obi-Wan can’t fool himself that the feeling of longing is stronger than ever in moments like these. 

If nothing else, he wants to be by Anakin's side fighting with him, but of course Master Yoda’s orders had been clear: Obi-Wan is to stay behind to guard the temple. 

It has only been about a month, but Obi-Wan's heart pangs at the absence of his partner. It makes him feel irrational and childish to admit it, but despite the danger, he’s allowed the attachment to flourish freely. 

The pain is worth it, though. The happiness he’s experienced in the past years outweigh any doubt he has about their relationship breaking the Code.

Despite the war, the Jedi, and the circumstances that surround Obi-Wan’s life, he has managed to find something that being a Jedi could never have given him. A home.

Following the start of their relationship, Obi-Wan’s blatant disregard for the Code had taken a toll on his emotional health. Breaking rules here and there on the occasional mission was nothing new to him ever since he had been a Padawan, but this was something entirely different. While Anakin and Padmé’s constant reassurances give him comfort that things will not change, he cannot help but worry what will become of him after the war.

For now though, he ignores those feelings as best as he can. He brings a hand to his chest and softly feels for the item he treasures the most. Personal belongings are not normally allowed amongst the Jedi, but the gifts he retains from his marriage are the only things he cannot bear to part from.

The chain hidden underneath the layers of his robes presses warmly against his chest. The two rings that hang off of it are an undecorated, shining silver.

The wedding was held in secret, by the lakeside in Naboo, the place Padmé loved best. The place where she had fallen in love with Anakin, before the war had started to tear them apart. It was a rushed decision, but the feelings were genuine. His love for Anakin and Padmé had swept Obi-Wan up in a flurry of feelings he had never anticipated. 

Anakin had already been knighted during the few months prior to the wedding. After all, Obi-Wan would have refused to accept the proposal in any way unless they were on equal footing. The truth of the matter though, was that the entire event had been Padmé’s idea.

He remembers the confrontation shortly after the battle on Geonosis, Anakin’s awkwardness after the fight and his unusual distance. Coaxing his then-padawan to talk had been difficult, but eventually he had gotten the information from Padmé. Anakin had fallen in love, and so had Padmé. The two wished to be wed in secret. 

That alone had been no big news to Obi-Wan, but Padmé had also admitted that she wished that he would join them as well. He’d tried not to consider the possibility of Padmé being anything more than a close friend, but years of holding back attachments had taken a toll on him. He’d tried to ignore his feelings towards her as he always had. But Padmé had told him that Anakin thought the same, that they had both felt empty without Obi-Wan by their side, that it wasn’t right unless they were all together.

Life is fleeting, is what she had told them both, and the war would surely endanger them beyond her control. She didn't care about the Code, and with Anakin already swaying Obi-Wan’s mind with his unconditional love and devotion, he was lost.

They would always rule his heart, and they would always be the most important thing to him. This attachment he felt was not obsession, but a healthy love that Qui-Gon himself had tried to educate the Council on. He wishes he could talk to his old master now, to tell him that however unorthodox his methods were, he's happy and thankful that he learned something the Jedi Code could never teach him.

He longs for his lovers’ presence now, to be around them. He wants Padmé’s soft touch on his shoulder, her kind words reassuring him that this war won’t tear them apart. He wants Anakin to come home already with his hard hugs and his ridiculous height that means Obi-Wan’s head fits perfectly under his chin.. He even admits to missing Anakin’s neverending awkwardness and the way it’s almost doubled when he’s around both Padmé and Obi-Wan.

As he reaches the hall that his quarters lie in, he sees someone standing outside of his door. The closer he gets, the more he recognizes the long lengths of fabric draped across the floor and the distinctive braids woven into neat buns atop the figure’s head.

“Padmé?”

Turning towards Obi-Wan, Padmé’s face breaks out into a grin. She grabs the trailing fabric of her dress in bundles as she strides towards Obi-Wan, eyes lighting up. 

Obi-Wan moves to give her an air kiss by her cheek, but is met with fabric and the scent of spices as she throws her arms around his shoulders in a hug.

Any other time and he would push her away, tell her this isn’t appropriate, not in the middle of the hall where anyone could see them. But right now, with worry and relief clouding his head, he holds her close and tightens the hug, burying his face in her shoulder and breathing in deep. 

“ _Obi-Wan_ ,” Padmé sighs as she lets go, “it’s been too long.” 

Wishing he could hold on a little longer, Obi-Wan steps back. “My dear, it’s hardly been a month.” Padmé had visited a few weeks ago on business but their time together had been short. With preparing for the mission and organizing alliances consuming both of their time, they had only shared a few passing glances. 

“Oh, even a day is far too long…” Padmé trails off as she looks Obi-Wan over. “Are you doing alright? You look tired.”

Resisting the urge to tell her that he’s always tired, he gives her a faint smile. “I’m fine.”

“Don’t do this to me Obi-Wan.” Padmé frowns as she places a hand on the side of his arm. “Is it Anakin?”

“Why does everyone always assume it’s Anakin?” Obi-Wan mutters to himself as Padmé lets out a laugh.

“I’m Sorry, Obi, is it something else then?” 

Obi-Wan shakes his head, “No, no, you were right the first time, it is Anakin.” 

Padmé gives Obi-Wan an understanding look. She is aware of the mission and the state of the temple. Anakin, having stayed at her apartments the night before his departure, most likely informed her of the situation. 

Anakin had seen Obi-Wan off privately as well, in his quarters under the guise of a quick meeting. 

“I'm probably going to make things a lot worse, then,” Padmé says as she pulls Obi-Wan towards his room. “We should sit down, it's important news.”

Obi-Wan opens the door and allows Padmé to guide them inside his quarters. The room is modest and empty, save for two plants that decorate the window ledge. “I don’t think I’ve ever been in your room before,” Padmé muses, “it’s...plain?”

“It’s no different than Anakin’s. Although, he seems to amass large amounts of junk and likes to hang up all those unnecessary posters.”

Laughing, Padmé takes a seat in the small room.

“I think it fits him. It’s nice that he can have a space to himself with no Jedi business to worry about once in a while.”

Over at the counter of the room’s small kitchenette, Obi-Wan begins brewing some tea. The motions are second nature, almost automatic.

“It’s unconventional, those things shouldn’t even be in his room at all. Jedi aren’t allowed-” Obi-Wan cuts himself off. Who is he to talk? He’s breaking far more rules just by having Padmé here.

Suddenly he’s hyper-aware of the metal around his neck, and the things that have taken place between him and Anakin in this room. His gaze lands on his bed, and Padmé, brow furrowed in confusion, follows it as well.

He knows she’s seen it the moment she gasps and rises from her seat to approach the bed. The walls of Obi-Wan’s room are bare except for a small charm that hangs above his pillow.

“You have one too?” Padmé asks excitedly, reaching over to look closer at the charm. Fiddling with the collar of her dress, Padmé pulls out a chain that holds matching rings, similar to Obi-Wan’s. Tugging them aside, she brings out a second chain made of leather; attached at the bottom hangs a charm almost identical to the one above Obi-Wan’s bed.

“Anakin gave that to me before he left for Mygeeto.” Obi-Wan says softly. He moves over to Padmé to get a better look at her wooden charm. “Did he give you this one?”

  


Padmé smiles, a faraway look in her eyes. “Not recently, no.” The charm she holds is rectangle in shape, old and worn and carved with symbols from Tatooine. “Do you remember how we all met?”

“How could I forget?” Obi-Wan chuckles. It hurts to think about that time– of Qui-Gon’s death and the uselessness he felt– but he doesn’t regret it one bit. The universe led him to Anakin and Padmé this way, in some cruel twist of fate.

“I know you and Anakin were never close when he was younger, but he made this when he was a child. He gave it to me all those years ago.” She fiddles with the trinket, looking up at the one Obi-Wan hangs on his wall. Instead of cream-colored, Obi-Wan’s charm is a diamond of a rich oak hue.

“I had no idea he’d thought so highly of you as a child. Not that he didn’t mention you every waking hour of the day once he was older.” Obi-Wan thinks maybe he could have stopped Anakin’s infatuation with Padmé, and consequently his and their relationship, had he been stronger willed. The thought disgusts him immediately, and he wishes he could take it back. He has no right to control Anakin’s feelings. 

“I distanced myself too much from him when he was younger,” Obi-Wan admits. “Sometimes I think...things would have been different.” They wouldn’t be together like this, is what he knows for sure. “Anakin was the one who always made the effort.”

“He has us wrapped around his little finger,” Padmé hums as she tucks away the charm and her necklace. “We certainly are a pair, aren’t we then, Obi?”

Obi-Wan doesn’t reply, just takes one last look at the charm on the wall before placing his hand on Padmé’s back. “Come, you said you had news?”

When Padmé takes her seat once more, Obi-Wan retrieves the tea and sets it on the table before sitting down as well.

“I received a message this morning from Ahsoka,” Padmé says calmly. 

“What!?” Obi-Wan exclaims, shocked. “She shouldn’t be communicating with anyone at all, it’s too dangerous. What was so important that it couldn’t wait?”

“The mission was a success,” Padmé continues, holding up a hand to halt Obi-Wan’s response. “The Council should be informed of this development by tomorrow, but Ahsoka came to me personally to deliver the news to you first.” Obi-Wan relaxes at this, but the lingering question of why Padmé deemed this visit important enough to be held in person still remains.

Padmé looks down at her lap before continuing, “It’s Anakin… He was injured, badly.” 

Obi-Wan stills. “And just how bad?”

Padmé shakes her head. “Ahsoka wouldn’t tell me, only that he’s being rushed here as soon as possible.”

Raising an eyebrow, Obi-Wan replies, “You seem oddly calm about this.”

“Please,” Padmé scoffs, “I’ve been nervous all morning. I wanted to tell you as soon as I could. It didn’t feel right if only I knew.”

He understands where Padmé is coming from, and he knows it was best that he hear the news now instead of later. It would give him time to calm down from the mixture of relief and worry that he feels now.

Padmé reaches across the table to take Obi-Wan’s hand in hers. “I can’t meet him tomorrow, but you’ll be there. Can you tell me if he’s alright when you see him?”

Obi-Wan gives her his promise and the two finish their tea, quietly conversing and catching up on missed time. He's glad that Padmé looks well and he envies Anakin’s ability to freely disregard the rules and visit her so often. Obi-Wan knows that he could choose to do the same, but it feels wrong; and they can't risk getting caught, not when they've come so far already. 

Padmé helps him tidy up, ignoring his protests and insisting that she repay him with what little she can do right now.

Obi-Wan stands at the door to see her off, and Padmé runs her hands down the front of his robes, adjusting them out of habit. “I don't know when we can meet again, so stay safe, okay?”

He wraps his arms around Padmé in a hug. “Of course, my dear.”

Reaching up to place a hand on his cheek, Padmé tugs him down to let their mouths meet. Obi-Wan sighs her name into the kiss. “Padmé.”

“I love you,” she whispers against his lips, and then the warm presence leaves him, and she is out the door before he can return the sentiment. 

Obi-Wan is left by himself. An overwhelming sense of loneliness overtakes him as he turns around to stare through the blinds of his windows. It's still day outside and there is much to be done, but all he wants to do is lie down and forget the unbearable stress of war. 

Shedding his robe that Padmé had so carefully fixed, Obi-Wan folds it neatly and lays it on a corner of his bed. It would be no use for him to try to work now. He is too distracted by his worry for Anakin as well as for the others, and the responsibilities that overlap this concern. 

He feels older than his days, and it shows not only in the wrinkles of his face, but in the heaviness of his heart.

Obi-Wan resumes the motions of his daily routine, filling a small pitcher with water and pouring it into the two plants by the window ledge. They are what remains of Qui-Gon’s few possessions. He considers them parting gifts and reminders of his past. The plants are small, green and leafy, things he had decided at the last minute to keep. 

He finds it ironic that the very thing he used to preached to Anakin to change is something he cannot let go of himself. All these items that surround him in this small space are unnecessary. No matter how small they may be, it is still against everything he has grown up to believe.

The plants are a small comfort, a reminder that someone before him also struggled with this concept, and that he is not alone in his confusion of how to guide his feelings. 

Closing the blinds, Obi-Wan retreats to his bed and lies down. He is still clothed in his overtunic and pants, too tired and numb to remove them. He buries his face into the single pillow he owns. It's lost the scent of Anakin from their secret meetings weeks ago, but Obi-Wan thinks that maybe if he tries hard enough, he can imagine that scent once more. 

Anakin always smells of oil and copper, leftover from the hours he spends on his hobbies, and Obi-Wan never expected to miss the strange combination so much. He wants Anakin’s body against his, even though the bed is too small to fit the both of them. He wants arms around him and lips against his forehead, He wants nothing more than to be able to hold and be held, to be able to forget his duty for just a few hours.

Frustrated and angry at his selfish desires, Obi-Wan just wants to forget. He wants Anakin to take him into his arms and take away his feelings of betrayal towards the order. He wants everything to seem clear again. He tosses and turns in a half attempt at comfort before closing his eyes and letting out a loud sigh.

When he blinks them open again he sees the charm that hangs above his head and all its simpleness. He wonders how Anakin does it. How Anakin so easily harnesses his own emotions in a way that is violent but so _him_. He thinks of the boy’s days on Tatooine when he was younger, and how easy it must have been for him to carry on with his carefree thoughts into adulthood. 

Obi-Wan wants things to be easy for himself, to be able to let go like Anakin. He wants to feel the thoughtless love that Padmé and Anakin share with each other. He wants to feel it with both of them, he wants to discard the order’s teachings, reform it somehow when the war isn’t at the front of everyone’s thoughts. Most of all, he wants Anakin to come home, for Padmé to tell him everything will be alright. He wants to ask Qui-Gon what he should do now, in these moments when he feels most lost.

With that, Obi-Wan feels his emotional exhaustion overtake him, and he slips into sleep.


	2. Coming Back Like You Always Do

When Obi-Wan wakes, it's to the sound of his comm ringing. 

“Yes?” He answers, voice still scratchy with sleep. 

“Master Kenobi? Is this a bad time?” Ahsoka’s shy voice is a welcome change.

“No, not at all. Why, what's wrong? Are you arriving soon?”

“Master, we've been back for hours, I've been trying to get a hold of you since this morning.”

“This morning!?” Obi-Wan asks incredulously quickly getting up to open the blinds. The sun is shining as brightly as it was when he had gone to sleep. 

“Obi-Wan, are you OK?” Ahsoka’s tone is softer now, filled with concern. 

He grabs his robes that had fallen off of his bed during his sleep, throwing them on haphazardly, “Yes, I'm fine, thank you, Ahsoka. Where are you now? I'll meet you there-”

“Oh no! That's not necessary, I just wanted to know if you've seen Anakin yet… He's not awake but he's in the infirmary. I figured you'd want to visit him because of… Well, yeah.” She trails off awkwardly.

“Wait. You know about-?” Obi-Wan asks, heart racing at the realization that Ahsoka knows about them.

“I know, I know, it's bad,” Ahsoka says hurriedly. “Anakin let it slip but to be fair he thought he was going to die, the whole situation is a mess. Honestly. Just ask him about it later - uh… Not now, he's resting, but-”

“Ahsoka, it's fine.” It's not, but Obi-Wan really just wants the girl to take a breath. “Who else knows?”

“No one! Just me, don't worry about it Master, I won't tell anyone, your secret’s safe with me.” Ahsoka falls silent and Obi-Wan can already envision her worrying her lip in nervousness.

“We will have a talk about this later, Padawan Tano. I need to speak to your master. Now.”

"Right," Ahsoka mumbles, and the comm goes quiet as she ends the call. But before Obi-Wan moves to leave, her small voice rings out again. "Please don't be mad at Anakin, it's not his fault.”

“I'm not mad. I'll speak with you later, Ahsoka,” Obi-Wan reassures her, then ends the transmission. He is out the door, neat and proper as he was when he entered the afternoon before, tiredness and fatigue hidden from his outward appearance. 

As he makes his way down the hall, it is evident that many Jedi have made the return from Mygeeto safely. He spies Luminara and Barriss, walking as they discuss the events of the mission. 

He passes by several other Jedi Knights as well as padawans before he sees Mace Windu approaching him with a hurried walk.

“Kenobi.” He says in curt greeting.

“Good afternoon, Windu.” Obi-Wan replies cheerily. He knows he's about to get chewed out for oversleeping, not to mention the several comm calls he's missed in the process.

“You were not present for the meeting.” Windu states, the obvious question of Obi-Wan’s whereabouts hanging in the air.

“My apologies, Mace. I had other obligations that required my attending to. Padawan Tano informed me of what I had missed.” Obi-Wan delivers the lie smoothly. 

“It was a rather important briefing,” Windu says raising an eyebrow, “I'm sure there were things Padawan Tano would not have known full details to.”

Were he Anakin, Obi-Wan feels that he would roll his eyes at this but he bites back the urge. “Yes. Ahsoka told me that Anakin is in the infirmary, I was just heading over there now to catch up on what I had missed.”

The tension between the two makes Obi-Wan uneasy. It's been this way between him and the Council for a while now. Ever since Padmé and even since Qui-Gon. His relationship with the Jedi is stressed and his actions recently have been under heavy scrutiny.

Windu seems to think on this. “Well, do try to make sure that your other obligations do not interfere next time.”

Obi-Wan assures him he will.

“Carry on, Kenobi.” Windu says simply as he gives Obi-Wan a nod and continues on his way.

 _Too close._ Obi-Wan thinks. He’s slipping with his control over the situation he's put himself in with Padmé and Anakin. Skipping work and meetings, disregarding Code for the sake of small comforts. His thoughts spiral once more and he begins to wonder if meeting with Anakin will only make things worse.

The shout of a youngling brings him out of his head. “Master Kenobi!”

The central hall is packed full of the returning Jedi, and amidst them is young Sammo Quid, hands cupped around his mouth so that his voice will carry.

Standing beside Sammo is Master Billaba with Caleb Dume at her side. Uzuma is there as well but seems to be more preoccupied with the other younglings surrounding her with interested ears as she tells of Caleb’s ventures.

“Sammo.” Obi-Wan greets, giving a nod to Depa as well. “Master Billaba, it's nice to come back to you in one piece.” 

Depa laughs, “Yes, things went surprisingly smooth. Your old Padawan is quite the leader.”  
“Please,” Obi-Wan says with a smile, “I take no credit.” 

“Master Kenobi, you were right!” Sammo interrupts. “Caleb is fine after all, Uzuma’s a big liar.”

Uzuma shouts a short, ‘Hey!’ at that from her spot a ways away, but Sammo ignores her.

“You were worried about me?” Asks a surprised Caleb.

Sammo looks at the ground, a guilty grin on his face.

Uzuma takes this chance to stride over, grabbing Sammo and Caleb by the arm, “Come on you two, we have to catch up, Masters can wait.” 

She gives Obi-Wan the stink eye, lips pouting in a frown.

“I don't think she's particularly fond of me,” Obi-Wan concludes, turning towards Depa as the children leave.

“Uzuma’s quite the handful,” Depa agrees. “How are you, Obi-Wan? I heard the temple was busy without us here causing trouble.”

“Please,” Obi-Wan chuckles, “I daresay I miss the thrill of battle.” 

“I see.” Depa says, her mind seeming to be focused elsewhere. Obi-Wan considers her to be a mystery. Questionable decisions mixed with a headstrong personality. Even when conducting her re-evaluations he felt unsure of his view on her. She seems to have healed well from her run in with Grievous though, and for that Obi-Wan is thankful.

“Skywalker risked his life for us.” Depa says, breaking the silence.

Obi-Wan perks up at this information, still unaware of the exact circumstances of Anakin's injuries. 

“My padawan and I were in danger trying to leave Mygeeto, flying isn't exactly my specialty as you know. He dove right into enemy fire,” she lets out a choked laugh as she continues, “nearly killed himself to give us time to escape.” Shaking her head in disbelief, Depa is still staring at the emptiness in front of her, still not looking at him directly. “You've taught him extremely well, not just to be a Jedi but to be a teacher himself. His padawan may have been the only reason he's alive right now.”

Obi-Wan returns the smile, albeit his is slightly strained, still trying to process the fact that _Anakin almost died._

“He's always been one for eccentrics.” He breathes out heavily.

Depa finally turns to face him. Their eyes meet and Obi-Wan sees how deeply serious she is about all of this.

“Skywalker should have left us to die, you understand this Master Kenobi, don't you?”

He has no answer for this, he wasn't there, he doesn't know the situation. He surely knows if he was in Anakin's place he would have ran, accept the losses and suffered later, because this is what the Code had raised him on.

Depa continues, noting Obi-Wan’s silence, “I know my own actions have been put under heavy scrutiny as well, especially in light of recent events, but he is dangerous Obi-Wan. I do not mean to others but to _himself_.” 

“He is a young man who has had the weight of many responsibilities thrust onto him from a-” Obi-Wan begins before Depa cuts him off.

“No, that is not what I mean.” She says sharply, voice hushed so that the others will not hear their conversation. “The Jedi order is not his place to be. You must take this coming from someone who understands how wrong our way is but continues to abide by it.” 

“Master Billaba I assure you there's nothing wrong-”

“Do not hide from me Kenobi, your emotions surround you like a suffocating air. I know this is abrupt, but my padawan has taught me much in these past few weeks.”

Shocked at Depa’s forwardness regarding his state, he wonders how evident his demeanor has been around the remainder of the Council.

“Caleb is inquisitive to a fault,” Depa says. “He questions things with a curiosity beyond that I've seen normally in children. This is to be expected of someone at his maturity. The Code is not perfect, we all know this, but to stray away from it at such a late age like Anakin is doing, I…”

Obi-Wan frowns, uncomfortable with this topic. “Are you not thankful to be alive? Anakin saved your life and you're criticizing his actions,” he says, trying to direct the conversation elsewhere.

Depa sighs, unfolding her arms from the inside of her robes, adopting a more casual stance. “I'm extremely thankful. If not for me, but for Caleb’s sake.” She places a firm hand on Obi-Wan’s shoulder. “I'm sorry, this is a time for celebrating our victory. I understand you hold your padawan with high regard, but I cannot help but worry for you, Obi-Wan. You're a friend I care deeply for.”

Shrugging her off, Obi-Wan shakes his head. “He's not my padawan anymore, Depa, he's my friend.” He knows she only wants what's best for him, but what Depa is insinuating puts Obi-Wan off. 

“I am not his caretaker nor have I ever been. If you have questions about his actions I recommend you speak to him yourself and not I,” He says bitterly before storming off. 

“Obi-Wan!” Depa shouts, running after him, “Listen to yourself right now! Do you not realize it isn't just him that has changed, but you as well?”

He ignores her and the rest of the hall’s occupants’ curious stares. He picks up his pace, thinking only of making sure Anakin is safe and sound. Now, with Depa’s words ringing in his head like warning signs, he’s worried about him mentally as well as physically. 

How many other people had questioned Anakin's actions during this mission? How long has he been struggling with this alienation from the Council, and was there anything Obi-Wan could have done to help him?

The amount of Jedi roaming the halls thins out the closer he gets to the Halls of Healing, and Obi-Wan wills himself to relax a little. He doesn't want to take his frustration out on Anakin.

Vokara Che greets him with a suspicious look when he walks into the main lobby of the healing center. She is an expert healer, dominating and firm with her control over the hall, stern and resolute with her patients. Obi-Wan admits she can be quite frightening at times. The two have developed a shaky relationship with each other ever since Anakin’s injury from Dooku. The healer wasn't very fond of Padmé either, the last they saw each other.

“Obi-Wan, I want to say I'm surprised to see Skywalker’s presence in my rooms once more.” Vokara squints at him. “I'm not.”

He gives the Twi’lek a sheepish look. “He's rested enough for visitors I hope?”

She waves a dismissive hand towards one of the entryways leading deeper into the hall. “Third door on the right, same as always. I think Skywalker should consider moving living spaces, he practically lives here.”

“I'll discuss it with him and get back to you,” Obi-Wan says jokingly. 

Vokara gives him a disinterested grunt and shakes her head, retreating to one of the other halls, probably to check on her other patients.

There is no point in stalling his visit anymore; Anakin is likely aware of his presence now. Even if they didn't have a bond, Anakin would still be a constant pulse of reaching force energy, always seeking Obi-Wan out. He thinks maybe an apology is in order for his absence this morning, but maybe Anakin had been sleeping too. 

Noticing that he was getting carried away with his thoughts again, Obi-Wan runs a hand over his robes, straightening them out before telling himself to calm down. Satisfied with his appearance, he opens the door to Anakin's room in the hall.

“Hey, Master.” Anakin says through a mouthful of food from his spot sitting up on the medical bed. His casual demeanor throws Obi-Wan off.

“Anakin.” Obi-Wan replies for lack of better words to say. He takes in Anakin’s appearance. There's a bandage around his head, and a few more on his face. His chest is bare save for the bandages wrapped around it, stained with dried blood. One of his legs is broken and bound in a cast. He appears otherwise unharmed.

“You just gonna stand there? C’mere, I missed you.” 

His legs feel heavy all of a sudden and the room seems to swirl around him. He takes a tentative step forward before he's rushing towards Anakin, crossing the short distance to wrap his arms around Anakin's broad shoulders, burying his face in the younger man's hair. 

Anakin carefully sets the tray he was eating from to the side before he returns the embrace. “Hey, you okay? I'm fine, see?” Anakin's voice is a soft whisper.

Obi-Wan lets out a wet laugh, “You're asking me if I'm okay?” He turns his head, stroking a hand through Anakin's curls, inhaling with a shaky sigh. He smells of the healing hall and bacta, but Obi-Wan doesn't care, Anakin is here, alive and safe. “I’m just glad you’re here, everyone kept telling me what happened to you.”

Anakin moves back from the hug, settling his hands on the sides of Obi-Wan’s arms. He looks up at Obi-Wan, concern in his eyes.

“You sure? I could practically hear you thinking through the door, what's wrong?” 

“Nothing,” Obi-Wan says quickly. “Master Billaba told me about the little stunt of yours.”

Groaning, Anakin runs his hand down his face. “I was hoping that wouldn’t get back to you.”

“Ahsoka and Padmé both thought it necessary to contact me immediately,” Obi-Wan says. “It’s all I’ve been hearing the past few hours.”

“You’re mad at me.” Anakin releases Obi-Wan, crossing his arms and falling back onto the bed. “You’re here to lecture me about what I should have done,” he says, anger lacing his words.

Obi-Wan sighs and nudges Anakin’s side. “Move over.” He sits on the edge of the bed and reaches out to stroke the side of Anakin’s face, careful not to disturb any injuries.

“I’m not mad,” Obi-Wan starts, “and I’m most definitely not here to lecture you, dear.” His hand runs down the length of Anakin’s cheek, over his neck, and down his collarbone. “Where are your rings?”

Enjoying Obi-Wan’s soft caresses and realizing he can relax, Anakin closes his eyes. “With Ahsoka. I handed them off before the healers got to me.” He opens an eye and winks at Obi-Wan, “See, I can be careful about this, too.”

“Yes, I take it that’s why Ahsoka knows about our relationship?” 

“That doesn’t count!” Anakin says, a hurtful look on his face, but Obi-Wan knows he’s just playing around. “I dunno. Having that happen to me made me realize someone else should know. Just in case.” 

Anakin realizes he’s said the wrong thing when Obi-Wan gives him a disapproving look. “Yeah, yeah, I’m reckless, I know the whole spiel.” His cheerful face begins to fall. Obi-Wan takes his hand in his, rubbing his thumb over the fitted glove that covers Anakin’s mechno-arm. 

“I care about you, Anakin. A far greater deal than I should,” Obi-Wan admits. “When you’re hurt I hurt as well.”

The leather fingers grip Obi-Wan’s hands, squeezing lightly. “I’m sorry if I worried you,” Anakin apologizes. “I’m different without you at my side.”

“I know,” Obi-Wan says, before pausing. He closes his eyes and focuses his attention through the force. Vokara is in another patient’s room, distracted and unlikely to walk in anytime soon. He shifts up closer onto the bed. “Padmé was worried sick. As was I. We love you. _I love you._ We want you safe.”

It’s a selfish thing to ask. Obi-Wan knows he cannot ask Anakin to stop being someone he can’t change. 

“I love you, too.” Anakin replies. Their bond dances around them, and Obi-Wan feels the raw energy and power that is the Force. He allows Anakin to reach up with his free hand and pull him down into a kiss, tilting his head to meet him halfway. 

Kissing Anakin is nothing like kissing Padmé, Obi-Wan thinks. Padmé emits an aura of warmth and the feeling of coming home after a long day. She is the foundation in their love, a strong base from which it continues to grow.

And Padmé’s lips are soft.

Anakin’s lips are dry and chapped from his time on the freezing planet that is Mygeeto. It is not an uncomfortable sensation, and he hears a chuckle come from the younger man when Obi-Wan’s beard tickles him slightly. But no, kissing Anakin is an entirely different experience. 

He is a flurry of emotion and feeling. The energy from his Force signature alone surrounds Obi-Wan with a sensation that is indescribable. Even when weak and injured, Anakin still leads him, hands exploring Obi-Wan’s chest and stomach. 

“Darling.” Obi-Wan chokes out weakly when Anakin’s lips leave his to find purchase on his neck. Hands caressing his neck and dipping under his tunic.

Anakin turns his head in embarrassment from the endearment. They’re both flushed and breathing heavily from the kiss. They lack any desire to continue further past that though. Anakin too injured to move. Obi-Wan simply happy to be near Anakin.

Anakin’s fingers brush the silver chain around Obi-Wan’s neck. “I wish we could leave,” he whispers into Obi-Wan’s collar, holding the rings in his palm.

“I can’t-” Obi-Wan begins before Anakin hushes him with a peck to his cheek.

“I know. I wouldn’t do that to you. I wouldn’t make you have to choose.” 

They hold onto each other a little longer, occasionally exchanging kisses and whispered words. Obi-Wan wants to be able to drop everything. He would leave the order for Anakin and Padmé were they not so far along in the paths they’ve chosen. 

“I can hear you thinking again.” Anakin hums, cheek resting against Obi-Wan’s shoulder.

When Obi-Wan opens his mouth to speak, he senses Vokara fast approaching the door. He untangles himself from Anakin’s arms, quickly stuffing the silver chain back into his robes. Anakin whines at the loss of his warmth but he shushes him. By the time the doors slide open, Obi-Wan is awkwardly standing by Anakin’s bedside, hands behind his back, standing at attention.

“Kenobi.” Vokara enters with a questioning look on her face. “Skywalker,” she greets as well.

“Hey, Che,” Anakin says casually, reaching over to grab the tray of food he had abandoned earlier.

Vokara tenses up, marching over to the bed. She shoos Obi-Wan off to the side. “You need to leave, you’re distracting my patient from finishing his meals.”

“I assure you, we were discussing important-” Obi-Wan starts but Vokara shakes her head. “Whatever you have to discuss can wait, Kenobi. I think it best you return to your quarters anyway, you look like something the cat dragged in.” Anakin hides his smirk behind a hand and Obi-Wan gives him a stern look.

“Of course, Master Che,” Obi-Wan says reluctantly.

“Do get some rest, Obi-Wan,” Vokara says as he backs out of the room.“ I won’t have you ending up in my facilities too.”

Obi-Wan waves her off. He heeds her words, however, and resolves to get some actual rest when possible.

When he returns again to the main hall, he sees that Depa is still there, once more joined by Caleb and his friends. Depa gives him an apologetic smile, their disagreement not forgotten, but something that can be bypassed for now.

Ahsoka is standing next to Barriss and Master Unduli, but she leaves her conversation with the two when she spots him.

“Master Kenobi!” She greets excitedly, a bright smile on her face. Her happy demeanor is infectious, and he is filled with fondness towards the young girl. 

The two exchange words and news, Ahsoka eager to describe the events that occurred on Mygeeto. She tells of Anakin’s exploits and teachings, of how fun it was to be able to work alongside her master. Not once does she mention saving Anakin, or the danger he had put himself in. Neither does Obi-Wan remember to confront Ahsoka about the rings or her knowledge of their relationship.

By the time he is back in his quarters and conducting his daily routine once more, albeit a little later than he normally would like, he has forgotten all about the stress of the past few days.

Knowing and seeing Anakin is fine is enough to keep him going. Their lives are not perfect, and they may never be, but Obi-Wan is satisfied as he is; surrounded by friends and the people he cares about. The war is of secondary importance in his mind and he thinks that perhaps in time things will work themselves out.

When he lies down to sleep, robes neatly folded and tunic traded for his casual sleepwear, he stares through the darkness above his head. The charm from Anakin hangs on his wall, small and barely there. He thinks of Padmé, lying down as well, her own charm tucked safely away in her possession. As he falls asleep, he feels the cold metal of his two rings like two points in the universe that connect him to his lovers, and he is content.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope this was ok!! the next part might take a little longer to write since i'm busy this summer, but we're hopping right back into the vaderwan in the next installment.

**Author's Note:**

> credit to my wonderful girlfriend [Silver](http://theironbullisgood.tumblr.com/) for betaing this! ( as well as the usual twitter crew, i love u guys )  
> and credit to myself for the artwork
> 
> and as always, you can catch me over at my tumblr, [octavigustus](http://octavigustus.tumblr.com/)


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